Illinois Dumb Laws

You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.

You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.

The English language is not to be spoken.

 

City Laws in Illinois

Carbondale

No one may stand on the sidewalk on the 500 block of Illinois Ave.

Champaign

One may not pee in his neighbor’s mouth.

Chicago

All businesses entering into contracts with the city must sift through their records and report any business they had dealing with slaves during the era of slavery.

Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.

It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.

It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe’s neck.

Kites may not be flown within the city limits.

In the Pullman area, it is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb.

It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.

Cicero

Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays.

Crete

It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one’s dog.

Cars may not be driven through the town.

Crystal Lake

If one wishes to plant new sod in his or her yard in the summer months, that person may not use the city’s water to water it.

Des Plaines

Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees.

Evanston

Bowling is forbidden.

It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.

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