Sumbitch

A filthy-rich Floridian man decided that he wanted to throw a party and invited all of his buddies and neighbors.

He also invited Leroy, the only redneck in the neighborhood.

Leroy was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating shrimp, oysters and BBQ and flirting with all the women.

At the height of the party, the host said, “I have a 10-foot, man-eating. gator in my pool and I’ll give a million dollars to anyone who has the nerve to jump in.”

The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash and everyone turned around and saw Leroy in the pool!

Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its butt! Leroy was jabbing the gator in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, head-butts and choke-holds, biting the gator on the tail, and flipping the gator through the air like some kind of judo instructor.

The water was churning and splashing everywhere. Both Leroy and the gator were screaming and raising hell.

Finally Leroy strangled the gator and let it float to the top like a dime-store goldfish.

Leroy, then slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was just staring at him in disbelief.

Finally the host said, “Well, Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million dollars.”

“No, that’s okay. I don’t want it,” Leroy said.

The rich man said, ‘Man, I have to give you something. You won the bet. How about half a million bucks then?”

“No thanks, I don’t want it,” answered Leroy.

The host replied, “Come on, I insist on giving you something. That was amazing. How about a new Porsch and a Rolex watch, and some stock options?”

Again, Leroy said no.

Confused, the rich man asked, “Well Leroy, then what do you want?”

Leroy answered, “I want the name of the sumbitch who pushed me in the pool!”

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